Stress

"Stress can play a bigger role in the development of heart disease than butter."

                                                                           - Dr. Jesse Hanley


Many of us are stress junkies. If life has not already given us enough stress we create it for ourselves. The reason this occurs is because our subconscious is programmed to stress mode. When things start slowing down and become more peaceful, our subconscious says, "There is something wrong. We are not feeling the need to fight or flight. This is weird and uncomfortable. Let's cause some stress." Much of why this happens is because our childhood environment was stressful. When we become adults we say we no longer want to live this way, but out subconscious keeps sabotaging our efforts to live more peacefully.

We also emulate our parents' ways to handle stress and life challenges. Therefore, many of us do not know any better even when we become adults. What is most likely to occur is that we pick up external habits in order to deal with stress, just like our parents did. It might not be the same poison that your parent chose to handle stress. Your choice could be any of the following.

• Drinking problems, even alcoholish.
• Smoking.
• Drug abuse.
• Overeating
• Busyness
• Over shopping and over spending.
• Excessive TV watching.

Our world has sped up quite a bit. Which only adds more stress. It  worsens as we age. When we get older we have more obligations: Work, bills, children, spouse, caretaking of parents, death of loved ones, etc. Not to mention dealing with our own health issues and problems that occur with age.

The worse news is that stress has been found to be the leading contributor for most illnesses. As though having stress itself was not bad enough.

• Stress creates a domino affect inside the body. Cortisol levels skyrocket, your arteries constrict, your immune system slows down, your heart rate increases, and your blood pressure climbs.
• Stress takes a toll in our bodies and forms diseases such as cancer and heart disease.
• Stress causes skin problems such as acne, eczema, psoriasis, hives, and vitiligo.
• Stress disrupts hormones in women and the results are abnormal periods (either none or excessive, and even menorrhagia), hot flashes, mood swings (basically the syptoms of menopause even before your time), and it is linked abnormal paps.
• Sress may induce a miscarriage.

You can see why it is best for all of us to learn how to manage our stress and use better coping mechanism when life presents us with challenging situations.  I wrote some tips on how to do this in my article titled Stress Management 3/29/12. I am still learning about stress myself. Actually I already know what to do, the challenge is to remember to apply it day by day.  I am a type A personality (which means I need to be in control and doing something). When an illness occurs, I lose all control which only exaberbates the illness itself .  I suppose my lesson in this lifetime is to surrender control to God. It must be, because every time I am going full speed ahead I become ill and my illness does not get better until I stop and let go.

I am also doing research on the subconscious. Mostly to gain the cooperation of the subconscious so that we are no longer okay with stress and therefore not create situations that bring more stress into our lives. I will keep you posted on my findings.

The Guest House

                                                       The Guest House



                                     This being human is a guest house.
                                     Every morning a new arrival.
                                     
                                     A Joy, depression, a meanness,
                                     some momentary awareness comes
                                     as an unexpected visitor. 

                                     Welcome and entertain them all!
                                     Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
                                     who violently sweep your house
                                     empty of it's furniture,
                                     still, treat each guest honorably.
                                     He may be clearing you out
                                     for some delight.

                                     The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
                                     meet them at the door laughing, 
                                     and invite them in.

                                     Be gratetul for whoever comes,
                                     because each had been sent
                                     as a guide from beyond.

                                                        -Rumi


Many people suppress or ignore their emotions by using externals such as alcohol, food, drugs, workaholism or busyness. Suppressing your emotions causes more harm than good. For one you will never find out what your emotions are trying to tell you and not grow from the experience of allowing yourself to feel.


The other drawback is that suppressing your emotions harms your body. Doctors are now finding that suppressed anger is one of the main causes for heart problems and high blood pressure. Long term depression is another cause for heart problems. Experts say that much of what leads to depression is suppressed anger. Anger that you feel hopeless or afraid to do anything about. Suppressed anger is also correlated with cancer.

Like Rumi, I recommend that you feel what you feel. What you resist persist and will continue to cause havoc in your body and life. Ofcourse you do not want to hurt others by expressing how you feel in order to let it pass through your body. There are various ways to feel your emotions in a healthy way so that it does not hurt you nor others. I have written several articles on just how to do it in this blog.

There are huge benefits for happy people, as I wrote in Happy People Win.  But you have to be a genuinely happy person. You can't fake it. It does not do you or anyone else any good to be synthetically happy. You also have to keep in mind that even people who are normally happy, experience sadness, anger, shame and envy. As long as we are human we will be experiencing human emotions. The difference is that real happy people experience emotions  and then release them. They do not hold on to negative emotions for days, weeks, months or years. Ofcourse there are exceptions, such as when there is a death of a loved one.


Don't feel bad and think that there is something wrong with you or that you must to do something when you are melancholy from time to time. When we try to avoid the feeling is when we end up getting into trouble. You have the right to feel what you feel. Don't let anyone tell you that you shouldn't feel a certain way. Their perceptions, experiences, character, and beliefs are different than yours, so they will not feel what you feel even if they are on the same boat as you.

If you would like more information please contact me on facebook under Zulma Carbajal.

Individuals who suffer from depression are four times more likely to have a heart attack than those who aren't depressed. - National Institute Of Mental Health (NIMH), 2001

Take It to Heart

                                  What a heart-on is:

"The place where intuition is born, the message that comes from the heart, the place where the heart turns everything else on, the expression of the authentic self, the ultimate 'aha!' of the heart and soul...I always said that my heart was a real heart-on, that is, up until the day my heart turned off."

                                                                                  -Pamela Serure




Most of us women never learned to take care of ourselves. We are savvy when it comes to everyone else's needs, but not our own. It is not our fault really. Unlike men,  even while still in diapers (some of us), we are taught to put the needs of others first before our own. Especially if you are the eldest girl in the family. While I have met some very selfish and self centered women, it is not the norm. I do not encourage anyone to be this way, but I do think it is time that we start to put our needs first.

Did you know that the leading cause of death for women is not cancer, not even breast cancer, but heart failure? A big part of the reason is because women are under a whole lot more stress than they were years ago and do not take time out from caring for others in order to care for their own needs.  Some women don't look after themselves even when they are diagnosed with a serious illness such as heart disease or cancer. Do to a scare I experienced these last couple of weeks, I am writing this article today. Not just in hopes that other women will wake up, but also as a reminder to myself that no matter what, I must come first. Regardless of the opinion of others. Specifically I will be writing about heart disease. No, this is not a 60-year-old man disease. This is happening to women under thirty who do not meet the the stereotype of a heart disease patient.

Facts About Heart Disease:

• It is the #1 killer in women, beating cancer, even breast cancer.
• Women are beating men in heart related deaths by at least 20% and the numbers are growing.
• Heart disease does not only happen to older, overweight and unhealthy women.
• It is difficult for doctors to detect heart disease in women because the symptoms are different.
• Some of the symptoms that women with heart problems experience are: Shortness of breath, chronic fatigue, dizziness, chest pains, mood swings, hot flashes and dry cough.
• The reasons women do not experience the dramatic heart symptoms like the men you see on TV who have a heart attack: 1. Women have more fatty tissue than men in the breast area. 2. Women have a higher tolerance to pain. Perhaps mother nature made us this way to handle child bearing.
• Often women are having a heart attack right in front of a doctor and he/she will not be aware of it even after a routine heart diagnosis normally given to men to check for heart disease.

Reasons why heart disease is even more dangerous for women than men and why we are outnumbering men when it comes to heart disease related ndeaths:

• Women do not stop. Even when they are diagnosed with an illness, much less when they are feeling fatigue or have a cough or some chest pains. This is especially the case if you are a codependent caretaker or type A personality (AKA workaholic).
• Stress contributes to heart disease and heart attacks. Women in our society are under extreme stress. Not only are most having to be cobreadwinners, but are still doing more of their share when it comes to housekeeping, cooking and child raising/caring.  So not only are women experiencing all day stress at work (some even work overtime), but when done they continue working at their second job at home.
• It is so difficult to detect heart disease in women and some doctors are not aware that the symptoms of heart disease are different in women than they are in men. Women are often sent home when they experience any of the symptoms mentioned above. Some women having a heart attack right in front of the doctor are sent home because of misdiagnosis.  They are told it was just anxiety, panic attacks, or are even  accused of being a hypochondriac.
• Many women are misdiagnosed with having menopause, perimenopause,or postmenopause. Menopause,perimenopause, postmenopause symptoms are similar to the heart disease symptoms women experience such as mood swings, depression, hot flashes,etc.

At risk women:

Physical Factors

• Are you overweight?
• Do you carry most of your excess weight in the stomach?
• Do you eat processed and/or fast food more than twice a week/ Have you been doing so for years, or perhaps your entire life?
• Are potatoes, carrots, and other starchy or sugary vegetables your primary sources of vegetable matter?
• Do you have high blood pressure?
• Do you have high cholesterol levels?
• Do you sweat heavily during or after the slightest physical exertion?
• Do you often have gastric trouble, acid reflux, or heartburn?
• Are you diabetic?
• Do you smoke? Have you ever smoked for more than a year?
• Do you have a family history of heart disease?
• Are you menopause,postmenopause,or perimenopause?
• Do you take hormones?
• Do you ever experience pain the jaw, neck, or shoulder region that is unexplained?
• Are you an emotional eater who prefers fatty foods?

Emotional Factors

• Have you been hiding something in your life for a long time?
• Have you had more than four unsuccessful love affairs/relationships?
• Do you have blue moods more than three times a week?
• Does something feel incomplete inside you no matter what you do?
• Do you dislike your body in whole or in parts?
• Do you admonish yourself for most of your actions?
• Do you often feel anxious,angry, or sad-or all three.
• Have you been depressed for more than three years?
• Is loneliness a factor in your life?
• Have you been heartbroken more than twice?
• Do you have fits of unexplained anger or rage?
• Do you feel as though your life has not turned out the way you wanted or expected to?

Mental Factors:

• Do you feel as though you're never satisfied?
• Do you drive your body too hard?
• Do you need to be in control?
• Do you fly off the handle easily?
• Do you overthink each situation?
• Is everything you do wrought with stress?
• Do you feel as though there is never enough time?
• Do you have an "off" button inside yourself that you can't seem to find?
• Do you worry endlessly about everything?
• Do you have a sense of futility about the future? 

If you answered yes to three or more to any of the above, please schedule an appointment with your doctor. Trust your intuition. Even if the doctor says you are just experiencing anxiety, let him/her know that you would still like to get checked for heart disease. Also, a good book I recommend that you get in order to learn more about heart disease in women is called, Take it to Heart, by Pamela Serure. This is where I got most of the information for the article and all of the questions above. Pamela is an a example of a woman with the appearance of perfect health: thin, young, ate healthy  foods (she was known as a juice lady for celebrities), and active. Yet she almost died of heart failure. The author actually was a health advisor for celebrities. No one could believe she had heart problems, much less that she needed two open heart surgeries in order to live.

I do not mean to scare anyone. Well actually I do. I worry that you may also be a workaholic/ caregiver like myself, and require to be scared strait in order to start taking care of yourself. Do what it takes to be there for you, even if it means allowing others to be there for you for a change.

"Fact: Heart disease is the leading killer of women in the United States, taking many times more lives than breast cancer, Breast cancer is a devastating disease, but you can't deny the numbers. Heart disease kills 499,000 women each year (compared with 432,000 men). Breast cancer kills 40,000 women each year."- Miriam E. Nelson, Ph.D