Stuck In A Rut in Love?

"Being stuck in a rut comes from being scared -of change, of loss, of regret. If you are stuck in life, you are likely stuck in love. When you live your life in a place of fear, you are in the Victim role. This means you see yourself under the control of the situations and people around you. You live in a place of "if only," rather than making proactive changes that will bring you happiness and satisfaction you seek. This is not a good position for finding love."


- Laura Berman PHD


These are the signs you may be stuck in a rut:

• You wont let go of a relationship that is not fulfilling and you tell yourself often "It's not so bad". What is actually happening is that you are afraid to face the truth. You do not wish to feel the pain of loss. You may also be afraid that you wont find anyone else.
• You are dating the same type of person over and over. You are stuck in an unhealthy pattern because you have not made it a commitment to heal your old wounds in order to move on to a healthier relationship.
• Being too picky instead of being choosy about the people you date. You date people for superficial and shallow reasons instead of paying attention to who the person is at their core.
• You don't date for love, you date because of fear of being alone.
• You date so that someone will save you or fix you and your life.
• You date numerous people at the same time to feed your ego and low self-esteem issues.
• You are promiscuous because you confuse lust with love or you believe that being wanted sexually means it must prove you are okay.

If you would like some assistance on healing old romantic relationships to prepare the way for new healthier love please contact me at carbajalzulma@gmail.com and I will share the various tools and exercises I have used for my own healing. If we do not heal old relationships wounds, we end up staying stuck in a rut in love.