Slowing Down Dating

One important thing that I have learned about dating is that you have to take things slow. It could be difficult to do when you are excited that you have met someone special. But there are several reasons why it will benefit you to slow things down. Here is a list as to why that is so.

• You avoid getting hurt. The person you are dating could get caught up in infatuation and make promises that he may not be able to keep. If you take things slow you will get to reach the point where infatuation has decreased and you could evaluate if he is truly developing feelings for you or if it was just the hormones making him talk crazy.
• You find out if he is even a person you want to be with long term. When you start dating, a man is in his best behavior especially if he is attracted to you. It takes time for his true colors to come out. Some men show their colors right away, but there are those who are able to conceal serious flaws at the beginning. However, no one can conceal deep issues forever and that is why you need to slow down enough to wait and see if he is who you thought he was when you first met him.
• You avoid commitmentphobics. If he is a person who is actively afraid of commitment, he will pursue you aggresively in the beginning. However, once you give in, his fears will overwhelm him and either he will break-up with you or just disappear like Houdini. You have to be self-protective and one way of doing it is by not letting yourself get caught up in what he says and let him remove all barriers before it is appropriate to do so. Only time will tell if he means what he says and will follow through. You need to take things slow to find out.
• You  do not make hasty decisions that you will later regret. People get very excited when they meet someone special and sometimes get carried away in revolving their whole life around that person. People who are passively afraid of commitment are especially prone in getting caught up in the fantasy and are more likely to change their life drastically in order to spend more time with their love. If you take things slow you will reduce the risk of disrupting your life for someone who turns out not to be the one.
• You get rid of the people who have an unrealistic view towards love and romance. Some people don't realize that it takes time to develop real love. Part of the reason is because of the media, movies, fairy tales, society etc.  These are the people who are only there for you when times are good. However, the day that you want to talk to him about something serious he wont be able to handle it and may even leave. When you slow down you get to see him in different situations and can better determine if he is a down to earth guy who you can have a real relationship with or he is only a fantasyland male you can never count on when you need him.

Related articles: My Dating Rules 8/24/12; Fear of Commitment 8/22/12; Pick a Different Flavor 8/14/12; Are You Running Away From Love? 8/2/12